When I was a mother for the first time I could head out and be inconspicuous. I flew under the radar and a trip to the shops was an easy venture. I’d have a few people comment on how cute my baby was and I would leave, most times, happy with a successful trip under my belt.
Fast forward to having twins and things are very, very different.
There is no hiding while you’re walking along with a double stroller and two kids who look A LOT like each other.
I’ve had people stand in my way so I’ve had to stop and talk with them. Sometimes, more often than not; I’m more than happy to engage. ‘Yes, they’re identical’, ‘they’re boys’, ‘they are one and a half’, and the old classic: ‘Yes, I sure do have my hands full’.
But some days, I just want to fly in and out.
Most mothers know it takes a lot of time and effort to get kids out of the house. After time this becomes easier as you realise you don’t need to take everything and the kitchen sink with you.
Getting out of the house with three kids is an even bigger challenge. Especially if you have two the same age! The piling in and out of the car and the coordination of their siblings (if they have any) is craaaazzzzyyyyy town.
I knew having twins would be a whole different ball game but I was not prepared for the attention they bring and the questions people feel their entitled to ask. I had one lady ask me if they were planned. Holy heck lady, please do tell me, how do you plan twins, or any multiple pregnancy for that matter!! I can’t seem to hide my ‘what the’ face and an eye roll in these situations. I just can’t!
All I ask is if you see a mother with multiples, please be mindful. She’s already feels like all eyes are on her. For her, it’s like the circus has rolled into town and she’s the main attraction.
Multiples are amazing and the fascination with them is genuine, I know this to be true. I’m not saying you need to take a wide birth of multiple mums when you see them out and about – not at all.
All positive comments are welcome. They make any mother’s days but think twice about asking questions like ‘were they conceived naturally?’ because it’s none of your damn business.
This is a friendly piece of advice brought to you by a mother who just wants to get bread, milk, chocolate and go home.
Ashleigh is the mum of three beautiful children. She had three under two, and by no means was that planned. The universe chose to throw a curve ball, with two beautiful boys, six months before her daughter’s second birthday. You can find Ashleigh over at Then There Were Five, as she navigates her way though this messy, beautiful, chaotic and amazingly rewarding new found career path known as motherhood.